Upside-Down

My world

so recently right-side-up

is upside-down,

again.

With my feet glued to the now-ceiling,

the blood rushes

to my head;

I try not to think,

try not to scream.

I don't understand,

yet it makes

perfect sense.

My heart is pumping as

emotions are changing.

With growing horror

I wonder:

If I close my eyes

and let myself

FALL

in this upside-down world,

do I fall down,

or fall up?

It's Just Too Bad

It's just too bad.

Things never go as planned.

Funny how people

who seem to be

totally clueless

sometimes give the best advice;

ironic that they can't simply

follow it.

It's just too bad.

A beautiful dream

becomes a

less-than-shining moment,

and then fades into a

distant, disappointed memory.

Epic.

Fail.

It's just too bad.

Things that seem

too good to be true,

usually are.

Separating illusion and reality

is a foggy drive

in the middle of a

drizzle at midnight

- with four flat tires.

It's just too bad.

Indifference

I can't afford to

answer you.

I'm afraid,

you see,

that otherwise you won't realize

the crazy power-pain of

INDIFFERENCE.

Pain brings me to

defiance,

which leads me to more

pain,

until someone breaks the cycle.

SO HERE WE ARE.

What will you

DO

about it?

Marked

I've forever been marked.

It's in my blood,

it's more permanent than my skin,

it's overtaken my heart,

it's a constant pull.

It's YOU.

I can't help it -

when you're away,

I ache for you.

Even if it's just the

quietness

of riding in your truck

at night, holding hands,

saying nothing, soaking in

the moment.

It has overpowered me

- YOU have overpowered me;

I never imagined the

FORCE

in falling in love.

It would most certainly
break me down

- dissolve me -

if it wasn't so busy

building me up.

Nasty Little Voice

There is a

nasty little voice

inside my head

that whispers

"Watch your step,

or he'll be gone!"

Sometimes,

it doesn't just whisper, it

SCREAMS

that I'm not worth it,

we won't make it,

you'll get bored.

It takes a hold of me,

and pours in:

"See her? She's better than you."

"Remember when you said/

did that? STUPID!"

"He'll be angry when you

tell him about that."

"You always mess up. And

You'll screw this up too."

Round and round.

Louder and louder.

Until I can't take it anymore.

I demand for

SILENCE,

and quake in the

absence of voices.

With shaking hands,

I reach for truth,

and uncover a

reality

that allows LIFE.

Rain

Rain falls,

cutting through the sky,

reviving what is

DEAD

on the ground.

Oh rain.

Please come closer.

Fall on ME.

I am always looking

to be made

new.

Dark Clouds

Funny now

sometimes

Dark Clouds

don't scare me.

I wish I

ALWAYS

refused to

be intimidated.

A Little Overwhelmed

On Sunday,

I give it all.

Nothing is big,

compared to You,

the God who holds

EVERYTHING

in His hands.

But it's Monday,

again,

and I'm definitely

freaking out.

God,

do You

REALIZE

what You've asked me to do?

I have

A MILLION

"what if"s

for You to tell me about.

I'M FEELING

A LITTLE

OVERWHELMED.

The Middle Seat

THE MIDDLE SEAT.

OH

how I missed

the middle seat!

I dreamed of being

back in that spot

for many days,

and many nights.

The middle seat.

I love riding there.

You are so much

CLOSER.

The memories I

have there are

beyond

beautiful.

The middle seat.

You are driving,

music is playing,

my heart is full.

You wrap your arm

around me

and I wonder if

life can get any better.

Fight For Me

I want to be

FOUGHT FOR.

Tell me I'm

WORTH IT.

Tell me it's

ME OR NO ONE.

Fight for me!

Don't lay down and

let me go.

I may

PRETEND

it's not what I want,

but honestly...

I NEED that.